Say ‘Ta-ra’ to the to-do list!
I found myself being very self critical today for my lack of energy and general lust for achieving. I realised after speaking with a good friend (thank you internet calls!) that I’ve essentially dealt with all this strife by throwing myself into aiming for a superhuman version of myself: all the fitness goals, language improvements, reels of music, jumpers finished (knitting!) alongside all the other things fun, and otherwise, that I feel should be achieved.
Freelancers are often highly motivated, and overworked. Now, without work, I wonder how many have set lists of things to do that spark excitement, rather than ‘I’d be disappointed if I didn’t use this time for x, y or z’. It’s not a race. Singers: We do not have to be fluent in 3 more languages, a full-blown yogi and have learnt all the operatic roles in our repertoire when the theatres open again. We are undoubtedly faced with restrictions at the moment, and a deep-seated concern for the health of loved-ones, and what our world will look like post COV-19, but there is still plenty of room for goals that excite us.
Perhaps the above list got you excited, and that’s awesome. Personally, I had reacted to this situation by mourning the lost work and debut, then throwing myself into a ridiculously long list of #everything I’ve ever thought would be cool to know and master – 4 days in and I was comfort eating and berating myself for lacking energy and not ticking off enough of my list
Now, more than ever, we should be looking long-term and taking the pressure off of the daily to-do list. Like the grandfather clock said to his protogé – just focus on the next tick, forget how many are ahead of you
I have now formed two lists of ideas, rather than chores. The first, consists of quarantine specific plans/projects and the other is longer-term goals which I plan to stick to post-COVID. I have found it much more rewarding, and motivating, to do items on the long-term list and the quarantine-only projects have become similar to stay-cation plans.
Thanks to Steven Isserlis and Matthew Rose on Twitter, I have been accompanied by new music, or new versions of classical pieces, on my afternoon tea break each day – ok, I take more than one tea-break a day, but I hope this will be a habit I keep up.
Singing-wise, I was doing alright for the last few days; music I’m working on was running through my head and I was doing some solid practice most days. After a coaching yesterday, via Skype, I was reminded of my spiral last time I had a work drought (Time to take stock)
It was confronting to sing for someone new over Skype, but thrilling to be working on the music. My energy levels soared and today was far more productive than previous days. No doubt the energy levels will waver, but if I can keep up just half of the planned ‘long-term’ additions, I’ll be happy.